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Chaos / Upheaval Fresh Start Mindset/Strenghts Resilience

Forging a New Path (When You Can’t See the Old One)

Katie started an office supply company when she was in her twenties. She grew the small business from her spare bedroom into a thriving brand with over three dozen employees. She was proud of what she’d done and the life she’d created for herself.

But three years ago, Katie discovered someone had embezzled the company’s funds and left it nearly bankrupt. The employee who’d committed this crime was Katie’s mother.

In the coming months, Katie lost everything—both her business and her home. She found herself in her forties starting her whole life over again.

Maybe you’ve found yourself in Katie’s shoes. You’ve lost everything and you have no choice but to rebuild your entire life. But you’re not sure what that process should look like exactly. here are some tips: 

 

Let Go

Start by letting go. Think about the things that are no longer serving you. Katie had spent years building up her business only to lose it. For a long time, she could only focus on what she’d had.

A friend encouraged her to stop looking backward. “You can’t move forward in your car if the gear is stuck in reverse,” She advised. “Terrible things happen to everyone. You don’t get a choice in that. What you do get to decide is what gear you’ll put your life in.”

Create New Traditions

Sometimes, the hardest part of starting over is letting go of habits that we loved. Maybe you were financially set and could afford to go shopping for new clothes once a week. Perhaps you were close with your family and had brunch with relatives every Sunday.

When you’re forced to start over, missing these traditions is painful. But don’t get caught up in sitting around wishing for how things were. Create new traditions that honor what your life looks like now. For example, you could invite your closest friends over on Sundays for game day or spend the time you use to go shopping to refashion old items in your closet.

Design Your Vision

When you’re forging a new path in live, it’s easy to get focused on what you don’t want. For example, if you’re leaving a bad marriage, you may swear off romantic relationships or a certain city.

While these blanket statements may make you feel good, they don’t help you create more of what you want in your life. This is where a vision board can be helpful. You can use one to create a positive image of the new life you’re looking to make.

The vision board you make can be physical—you can grab magazines, books, and other old media to create yours. But a vision board can also be digital and you can use a website like Dream It Alive or Vision Board to design yours.

Click the link below to listen to short audio about Resilience After a Crisis – currently we are experiencing a global Pandemic and many people are being forced to rebuild their lives in some way or the other.

Rebuilding your life after adversity isn’t easy. But you have the smarts (and the power!) to do it. Embrace this season of rebirth in your life!

Are you struggling to rebuild your life after adversity? It’s sure not easy….but it is possible!  It also helps to have someone to walk along side you to guide and support you – I would love to help! Let’s chat about what you need to pick up the pieces and start over. You can book you free session with me here

 

Categories
Mindset/Strenghts Resilience

7 Things You Can Do To Create Happiness During The Toughest of Times

Upheaval drags everyone down. A crisis wears on a person, eroding mood and destroying optimism. As you go into survival mode, it becomes harder and harder to hold onto any kind of joy at all. Instead, your days are taken up with emotions such as worry, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, and fear. 

It seems like a pretty tough time to find happiness, doesn’t it?

Yet, more than ever, this is precisely when you need happiness most. It’s a positive outlook and a great deal of optimism, which is going to get you through these tough times, which means it’s up to you to create this happiness as soon as possible. Why not try these tips?

# Take a Walk

Physical exercise promotes mood in tremendous ways. Seize the chance to take a break for a few minutes when you can and step outside. Walk at an even pace, fast enough to raise your heart rate a little for the best results.

 

# Find a Distraction

You can’t focus on the crisis every minute of the day without driving yourself crazy. Occasionally you need to give your brain a break. Try reading a book, watching a show on TV, doing a puzzle, or engaging in a hobby for a little bit. 

 

# Eat Something Good

It’s so easy to forget regular meals when you’re in the midst of a crisis. But low blood sugar affects mood in negative ways. Also, if you’re just grabbing snacks, junk food can make you lethargic and inhibit your ability to think clearly. As much as possible, try to maintain a regular schedule for meals. And eat healthily!

# Fix Something

Your world is out of control and can’t be fixed easily. Help your mood by finding something you can correct and exert control over this situation. Why not do the mending you’ve set aside? Or do one of those little home repair jobs you’ve meant to tackle. 

 

# Sleep

Lack of rest does affect mood negatively. Even in a crisis, you need to sleep. Stay on your sleep schedule as much as possible.

 

# Hang Out with Friends

It’s not mentally healthy to isolate. Make time for friends, even if for only a short phone call. Touching base with people who love and support you will do wonders for your mood.

# Do Something

Act. Nothing makes you feel more helpless than inactivity. It might be you’re not able to do what you normally would during this upheaval. Instead, find the next best thing you can do and focus on that for five minutes at a time until it’s done.

Remember, happiness can’t be forced. Some days you’re just going to feel what you’re going to feel. But by paying attention to your mood and working to improve it, you set yourself up for the greatest success. 

Looking for a coach to help you with creating more happiness in your life? I can help! Check out my affordable coaching packages to help get you out of your moment of chaos and onto a clear path to getting things back on track to normal. Contact me today

Categories
Chaos / Upheaval Mindset/Strenghts Resilience

10 Resilience Power Words

Resilience speaks to one’s ability to bounce back from difficulties and catastrophes experienced in life. Resilience is essential to navigating life because adversity and challenges are inevitable.

While there are a variety of things related to resilience, the following is a list of resilience power words. Each of these words is linked to the development of resilience, which ultimately equates to the ability to handle adversity with grace.

# Acceptance

Adversity is inevitable, so learning to accept and embrace it is essential to developing resilience and navigating challenges well. Those who are resilient accept difficulties as a part of life and spend their time and energy learning to adapt to the adversity rather than fighting it or running from it. The choice to lean into the discomfort and embrace it ultimately helps people better deal with and bounce back from the hardships they face (Waters, 2013).

 

# Adaptability

The ability to be able to adjust and shift as new circumstances and challenges arise is a key facet of resilience. Those who are resilient can develop numerous strategies from dealing with stressful situations. This flexibility in the way they think about challenges allows them to respond flexibly with regards to their emotion. Thus, they are better able to shift from one coping strategy to another depending upon what is best given the specific set of circumstances (Barker, 2016).

 

# Awareness

Awareness is also heavily tied to the development of resilience. Awareness helps individuals understand what they need, how they feel, when they need to reach out for help, and when they need to make adjustments and improvements. Being aware of what personal adjustments need to be made to one’s self or one’s situation helps individuals gain the knowledge and information needed to best approach and navigate the challenge at hand (Waters, 2013).

 

# Boundaries

Boundaries in the context of adversity relate to one’s ability to create distinction between who they are at their core and the cause of their current negative circumstances. This means being able to understand that the adversity currently being faced is temporary.
This also means refraining from allowing the negative situation or circumstance to become one’s permanent identity. Being able to set these boundaries aids in quick recovery from trials because individuals understand that their situation will eventually change for the better, and there is the understanding that their identity is not rooted in the trauma. Thus, there is an ability to approach the challenge with a more positive attitude, and less likelihood of allowing the challenge to define one’s self (Waters, 2013).

 

# Confidence

A key to learning to cope with the stresses of life is a belief in your ability to do so. Research shows that there is a link between one’s self-esteem and one’s ability to handle stress and recover from negative events. People who lack self-esteem have a tendency to approach negative events with a negative outlook, and in general, have more negative outcomes. On the other hand, those who possess high levels of confidence in themselves and their abilities, approach negative circumstances with the belief that they possess what is necessary to overcome the circumstance. Thus, their outcomes tend to be more favorable (Cherry, 2020).

#Goals

Goal setting and resilience are linked in the sense that setting goals help breakdown challenges and hardships into more manageable parts that can be tackled and conquered. Goals allow challenges to be addressed in a realistic manner while also helping people to manage their emotional response to a given situation. When a person can tackle a situation one step at a time, there is less anxiety, less stress, and more probability of a favorable outcome. This ultimately means a better ability to bounce back from adversity (Cherry, 2020).

 

# Optimism

Optimism is the ability to look at situations and circumstances and find the positives, even in the midst of what seems like endless negatives. The ability to approach hardships with this type of positive attitude is key to being able to quickly recover from the difficulties we face in life.
True optimism isn’t about ignoring the negatives, but rather paying attention to those negatives that are relevant to the problems they face and then actively choosing not to remain focused on those negative solely or long term. True optimists who are able to foster resilience learn how to balance a positive outlook with a realistic view of the world and that helps them bounce back from challenges faced (Barker, 2016).

 

# Problem-Solving

There is research that suggests people who know how to analyze and develop solutions for problems are better able to cope with challenges as compared to those who do not know how to do those things. Being faced with a challenge creates an opportunity for individuals to do the work and learning that will help them develop potential solutions for the issue at hand.
It is that regular and consistent work of engaging in exercises that build focus and encourages non-traditional thinking that better helps individuals reason to able be able to solve problems in future scenarios (Cherry, 2020).

# Purpose

Finding or creating a sense of purpose for yourself in the midst of adversity or crisis can significantly help when it comes to coping and recovery. Developing a ‘why’ becomes the motivation needed to do the work that will help you get through the crisis. It is the purpose that makes the work of fighting through the trouble worthwhile and sustains your ability to continue moving forward so you can overcome adversity (Cherry, 2020).

Having a support system in place when faced with difficulties is essential to building resilience. The emotional support offered by having additional people to help you carry the load of mental/emotional burdens can make the adversity more manageable and easier to navigate.

Additionally, others can remind you of your abilities and strengths which may help you tap into the skills and inner strength you need to persevere. The support of others can also offer practical physical support and provision of resources and information that will aid you in overcoming the challenges you face (Barker, 2016).

Resilience is linked to so many other useful traits and qualities. In fostering resilience, one is able to foster the qualities mentioned in this article, and by fostering the characteristics noted in this article resilience is subsequently strengthened.
Thus, an emphasis on continued growth in any of these areas is sure to result in improved resilience which is sure to result in a better ability to navigate through life.

Looking for a coach to help you with developing resilience? I can help! Check out my affordable coaching packages to help get you out of your moment of chaos and onto a clear path to getting things back on track to normal. Book your free 20 min clarity session with me here

 

References:
Barker, E. (2016, April 26). 10 ways to boost your emotional resilience, backed by research. Time. https://time.com/4306492/boost-emotional-resilience/
Cherry, K. (2020, January). Use these 10 tips to improve your resilience. Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/ways-to-become-more-resilient-2795063
Waters, B. (2013, May 21). 10 traits of emotionally resilient people. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/design-your-path/201305/10-traits-emotionally-resilient-people