You wouldn’t think it matters, but the truth is, some people thrive on social interaction. Others don’t.
But even if you’re not an introvert, social interactions can sometimes be draining. The problem is these interactions tend to be the ones where you do need to be at your best. Think about the last time you had a job interview or spent time in conversation with a mentor. Even the best conversations can leave you tired.
So, how do you turn this around and keep up your vitality for even the most draining social interactions?
Imagine Who You Want to Be
If you want to have high energy during social interaction, you first need to picture yourself as someone who has this kind of energy.
What does it look like?
What kind of gestures would you use when speaking?
What tone of voice do you use?
Do you laugh or smile often?
If you can picture the person you want to become, it’s much easier to become that person. This might seem like a form of acting, and at first, it might well be, but the more you do it, the more authentic this high-energy version of yourself will become.
Try Being Someone Else
Who do you admire who has a lot of energy?
This might be an actor or celebrity, or it might be your own best friend. When interacting socially, start asking yourself how this other individual would likely act in the same situation. Do what they do. Again, mimicking high energy has a funny way of becoming high energy.
Try Some Coffee.
This one won’t work for everyone, but coffee is a great stimulant. If you know you’re going to be needing a lot of energy for an upcoming social situation, why not have a cup of coffee beforehand?
You might need to experiment with this slightly to figure out how much coffee gives you an optimal amount of energy without leaving you jittery.
Look Around
When attention lags, it’s natural to come off as being more low energy. By remaining interested in your surroundings and especially in the people around you, you naturally maintain a higher level of energy.
Start taking note of details. This has the added benefit of giving you things to talk about.
Deal with Stress
If the energy drains right out of you in social situations, chances are it’s because you’re stressed. Any time you’re experiencing anxiety, your body takes more energy to get through simple tasks.
With this in mind, the best way to get more energy for social situations is the deal with the root of the anxiety you’re feeling when being social. This might mean dealing with some baggage. It’s worth it in the end, though.
If you would like some help in coping with life as an introvert, I’d love to support you. I am an introvert too so I understand the pressures. Schedule a free call with me here so we can chat:)
You’ve probably read dozens of articles on how to develop healthy relationships with others. However, we don’t see many articles that discuss how to work on improving your connection with yourself.
The irony is that no other relationship is as important to your health as your relationship with yourself. You may not realise it, but this relationship governs your entire life…
It influences how you manage relationships, interact with colleagues, deal with conflict and even sleep at night…and so much more.
Today, I’ll show you how improving your connection with yourself can make you a happier and more fulfilled person.
Let’s get started…….
So, how do you go about improving your relationship with yourself?
To begin, you must take your beliefs, feelings, and goals seriously. Then you must recognise that your flaws and your strengths are two sides of the same coin. They coexist to form the unique individual you are today.
It’s critical to remember that no one knows what it’s like to be you. This is why you must be your best friend. Learn to be compassionate to yourself and to others.
Begin with these five techniques to boost your self-esteem so that you are confident in yourself and believe that you are worthy of others’ respect.
#1: Recognise Your Likes and Dislikes
Self-acceptance is defined as knowing what you like and dislike.
It also implies that you do not alter your way of life or the way you do certain things just to please others. Allow yourself to be seen for who you are, flaws and all.
That can be difficult at times.
Our society teaches us that following the rules of others is the only way to fit in and be accepted.
Recognising that we are all unique requires accepting your uniqueness and learning to embrace it.
Understanding your likes and dislikes, as well as your strengths and is essential. Once you’ve identified those, you’ll be able to do more of what makes you happy.
#2: Be Kind To Yourself
We are sometimes our own worst enemies. We are merciless in our criticism, pricking and prodding at our perceived flaws.
Our weight is usually at the top of the list. But there are other things we obsess over including the shape of our bodies or the bags under our eyes.
For a change, why not try something new? Find one thing you like about yourself the next time you look in the mirror. Praise yourself and express your appreciation for it.
Now this may not be easy. In fact, you might not even think of anything to be thankful for at first
You are not alone, so don’t be surprised. Almost nine times out of ten, your gaze will be drawn to the aspects of yourself that you dislike.
But don’t be discouraged. You’ll be able to make a list of everything that makes you beautiful and unique with daily practise.
What about all the other things you dislike? Accept them as they are. They are still a part of what makes you the special and unique individual that you are.
Just be your own unique beautiful self.
#3: Pay Attention to Yourself
Pay attention to your gut instincts when something feels off. Even if it’s difficult, uncomfortable, or contradicts what others say.
Allow yourself to feel and become at ease with your emotions and beliefs. When you listen to your body and gut instincts, you will experience inner peace and a sense of belonging.
You’ll get better at understanding your body’s cues and signals after a while. Only then can you begin to strengthen your connection with yourself.
# 4: Create Good Habits
Developing healthy habits is an easy way to improve your relationship with yourself.
Your healthy habits can begin with when you first wake up in the morning and end when you go to bed at night.
These healthy habit practises could include any of the following:
Journaling and/or a gratitude journal
Make a list of positive affirmations to increase your self-worth.
Regular exercise – this is essential.
Plan healthy, well-balanced meals on a regular basis.
Meditation should be done mindfully.
Smile! It elevates your mood and relieves stress.
#5: Encourage Positive Behaviour
Many of us are all-or-nothing people. We decide to do something, and as soon as we begin to hit a tough patch , we call it quits and vice up!
Perfectionism can be a part of this. And depression can be caused by perfectionism. It traps you in a cycle of self-blame and negativity, which can lead to a dark and lonely place.
To break free from this toxic cycle, first accept that you are not perfect. You will make mistakes, and your day will not always go as planned. That’s fine!
Assume you set a goal of going to the gym for an hour five times per week. The first week goes as planned, but you miss a day (or two!) the second week.
You then have two options: just give up and cancel the entire event….. or continue where you left off. If you find that five days a week is too much by week three, reduce it. Instead of a full 60 minutes, try a half-hour.
This does not have to be limited to exercise. It also applies to your diet, sleep, and work objectives. Do the work while showing yourself some love and encouragement. Everything else will fall into place.
Conclusion
Having high self-esteem helps.
Good self-esteem enhances your sense of self. It’s one of the most effective ways to cultivate a positive relationship with yourself and, ultimately, with others.
Each of the five techniques aims to improve your relationship with yourself. That should be your top priority. These techniques can boost your self-confidence and keep you grounded if you practise them on a daily basis. As a result, you can form a strong, balanced connection with yourself. Only then can you begin to live in accordance with your true self:)
Self-defeating, mistaken beliefs are the debilitating thoughts you have about yourself or how you view your relationships with others. They can get so carried away that they lead to panic disorder, anxiety, and depression.
Case in point, your beliefs affect everything you do. In fact, every decision you make starts with a belief of some sort because your beliefs are a collection of everything you know to be true.
Yet, sometimes what you believe is actually based on false emotions or memories. What do you do then? Is there hope of changing? And if yes, how can we disrupt our faulty belief system and change it for the better?
How Faulty Beliefs Affect Everything You Do
What you convince yourself to be true ultimately becomes your beliefs. Good or bad, your subconscious mind has complete trust in how you see the world and how you interpret certain things that happen to you in your life.
Then, it takes your thoughts and emotions and comes up with a skewed view of how the world works. So, in effect, you’re the one who’s holding yourself back from living a fulfilling life brimming with adventures and lots of happy times.
Tony Robbins said it best: “The only thing that’s keeping you from getting what you want is the story you keep telling yourself.”
What Are Faulty Beliefs?
Faulty, or limiting, beliefs are the opinions and thoughts you believe to be 100% true. They’re so ingrained in your mind because you spend each day repeating them to yourself, like a mantra.
Sometimes, you may also blame other people, and the Universe in general, for everything that goes wrong in your life. Why? You’ve convinced yourself that this is your reality through the power of faulty beliefs.
However, limiting beliefs are called that for a reason. They stunt your growth as an individual and have a negative impact on the way you go about your personal and professional life. So, you feel stuck, incompetent, and that failure follows you around wherever you go.
Where do Faulty Beliefs Come From?
On average, faulty beliefs are developed during our early childhood years. According to Dr. Bruce Lipton, the first seven years of our lives are extremely critical because our brains do nothing but soak in everything around them. This is how we form the basis of right vs. wrong, good vs. evil.
This is also the time when children who are loved and valued grow up with this inherent belief. Consequently, their relationships with themselves and others stem from that love and self-worth.
Sadly, the opposite is also true. Children who are neglected or abused become adults with a deep belief that they’re not worthy of love and affection.
Another way to look at it is that faulty beliefs are our way of defending ourselves against frustration, anger, sadness, and other negative emotions.
As a result, your subconscious brain tries to block further suffering by altering how you view yourself and the world around you. This manifests itself in many ways, and each of them has a negative effect on everything you do in life.
Take a look at some of the negative outcomes that are a by-product of faulty beliefs:
Anxiety
Conformism
Imposter syndrome
Overthinking
Perfectionism
Procrastination
How to Identify Faulty Beliefs?
Let’s be honest, you can’t tell yourself you’re a winner one day, then wake up the following day believing it wholeheartedly. If only it could be that easy. But this is a time-consuming and patient process. And you have to be willing to put in the work, but it’ll be so much worth it in the end.
Step 1: Listen to Your Thoughts
The first step in identifying faulty beliefs and self-defeating thought patterns is by really paying attention. The next time that little voice in your head tells you that you’re better off not doing something or having so-and-so, stop and listen.
Step 2: Challenge Faulty Beliefs
The second step is to challenge these beliefs head-on. When you have a negative thought, hit it back with two positive ones.
They don’t have to be big or anything fancy. Just think of something that makes you smile and brightens your day.
Then, slowly, day by day, you’ll notice that the nagging voices in your head are becoming weaker. They no longer drain your mental and emotional strength because they’ve been replaced by more positive thoughts.
Step 3: Develop Healthy Beliefs
In order to transform faulty beliefs into something healthier and more productive, you have to know your self-worth. Be proud of who you are and what you’ve accomplished, imperfections and all.
Then, armored with self-love and compassion, take one step outside your comfort zone. Think about one thing you try to avoid on purpose, say social interactions.
To overcome this fear, you have to commit to engage in a brief, meaningless conversation with one or two people each day. Putting yourself out there can be scary, just as many things in life can be.
And remember that it’s okay to be a bit awkward at times. Who isn’t?
But strong, optimistic people know there’s more to them than a few minutes of awkwardness. They’re more confident and comfortable in their own skin that they just shrug it off and keep on moving forward.
That’s why you have to keep at it. Continue to challenge your faulty beliefs so you can finally start seeing yourself and the world in a more accurate light, where hope and possibilities are within arm’s reach.
