Categories
Fresh Start Self Care Self Esteem/Self Confidence

Live Your Best Life: Focus On What Matters Most

Have you ever stopped to notice how fast our days seem to fly by? We wake up, bombarded with an insane amount of things we have to get done. Then, just like that, the day is over.

Of course, having the world at your fingertips doesn’t help to slow things down. It only adds to the chaos.

Today, I want to focus on what matters most in our lives. That could mean different things for different people. Nevertheless, each one of us has certain things they value more than others.

So, read ahead to find out how you can live your best life by focusing more on the things that matter.

The Most Important Things in Life

Having status and designer shoes are great and everything. But having them won’t make you any happier or healthier than the average person.

Another thing we tend to obsess over is what we don’t have. Sometimes, it becomes our driving force that can lead to negative habits and behavior.

Let me ask you this: do you want to live your best life today and every day? This is what you should do:

#1 Identify What Matters the Most to You

First, take a step back and look at your life from a different vantage point. Next, try to dissect each aspect of your life. Which areas should you pay more attention to? Which should you cut back on?

To lead a balanced, well-fulfilled life, consider having one, or all, or the following. Maybe you can even add a couple of our own to the list.

  • A healthy body and mind
  • Family and friends
  • Money in the bank
  • The drive to constantly learn new things
  • A place to call home 
  • Realistic goals and a purpose in life

The takeaway: Recognizing that what matters most in life has nothing to do with material possessions can help you appreciate what you have. Reconnecting with these things can lead to a better, happier, fuller life. It can also boost creativity and lower stress. It also gives you control over your happiness, rather than allowing external factors to affect your inner peace.

A woman holding a heart

#2 Listen and Pay Attention

While it’s important to listen to those close to you in life, it’s much more than that. It’s also about listening to yourself and paying attention to your likes and dislikes. This is a measure of your true worth and how much you love yourself.

Self-love requires practice, but it gets easier with time. When you’re at peace with yourself, you allow yourself to love others in a healthy, mature relationship.

The takeaway: Show yourself the same kindness and compassion you show others. When you look in the mirror, focus on the good rather than the bad. Treat yourself to nice things and be happy with who you are.

#3 Be in the Present

Too often, we find ourselves regretting the past or worrying about the future. However, what matters the most is the moment we’re living right here and now.

Connecting with the world around you makes you appreciate what you have. The more you’re in tune with your ‘present,’ the more you’ll realize just how precious life can be.

As Earl Nightingale said, “Learn to enjoy every minute of your life…Think how really precious the time is you have to spend, whether it’s at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.”

The takeaway: Being self-aware helps bring tranquility and happiness into your life. In turn, the happier and calmer you are, the more things you’ll find to be thankful for.

man on top of mountain taking pictures

#4 Find a Hobby

Hobbies are the things you do for fun in your free time. They can range from knitting to deep-sea diving to jumping from airplanes.

Your experiences in life are what make it worth living. They give it meaning and shape the way you see others around you. Doing something you enjoy has been widely hailed as one of the best stress reducers of our time.

You can also use it to push your boundaries a bit and step out of your comfort zone. Sometimes, the idea of doing something new can be terrifying. If this happens to you, recognize your fear. Then, tell yourself it’s okay to be nervous about something new.

The takeaway: Live your life. Be eager to try out new experiences. They’re what add fulfillment and richness to your life.

#5 Practice Positive Habits

Identifying positive habits and carrying them out daily brings order to your life. Good habits also result in good physical and mental health.

With a steady routine, you can reduce distractions that stand in the way of your accomplishing things. They also help steer you towards making better decisions. Studies show that by creating routines and enforcing good habits, you become better at taking care of your life, health, and overall well-being.

The trick is to be authentic to your values and beliefs. Let’s be honest, that can be hard to do in this media-frenzy world we’re living in. Yet, just having confidence in who you are can help shine the light on what matters most in your life.

The takeaway: Your thoughts are expressed through your words and, ultimately, your actions. Those actions turn into habits, so make sure you stick to enforcing positive habits in your life.

Final Thoughts

These five things are just some of the ways you can focus on what matters most in your life. At the end of the day, what it boils down to is that to live your best life, you have to focus on certain things over others.

Remember, what matters more to you may not be as important to others. So, stay true to your values and hold on to the things you treasure more in life.

Categories
Chaos / Upheaval Fresh Start Mindset/Strenghts

What Can We Learn From Chaos and Crisis?

I still marvel at the incredible opportunities that are hiding inside chaos and crisis, although I was unable to see that at the incredibly emotionally painful time of my separation and divorce.

The most positive things I learned was to view a crisis as an opportunity, where lessons can be learned. It is an opening for change and improvement, and to view a situation through different eyes. 

As I began to pick up the pieces of my life and place them one by one into a new normal,  I increasingly sensed a strong desire to use the lessons I had learned to try and help others experiencing challenges and heartache. 
This led me down a completely new career path, from teaching – to gaining qualifications as a coach and counsellor. I will never forget one of my counselling clients – a special young woman I will call Amanda for privacy reasons. 

Amanda taught me about resilience, pain and purpose. Let me tell you about the incredible struggles she overcame…

Amanda was referred to me by her doctor as she was struggling with depression, bulimia, suicidal thoughts and addiction. We would meet each week, and for the first couple of months, Amanda would sit cross legged on the floor in my office, cuddling one of my teddy bears, sobbing her heart out as she talked about her life. 

close-up photography of brown teddy bear

My heart ached for her – her life had not been easy, she saw no reason to go on and her lifestyle was threatening her mental and physical health. 

But….. Amanda still had the tiniest flicker of fight left in her, so we developed strategies together to fuel the tiny flame inside of her. Each week I would be overjoyed to see the triumphant small positive changes Amanda was making.

After one year, Amanda had reinvented herself! After three years, she contacted me to invite me to her graduation…. and to meet the handsome man beside her who was now her fiance. 

This courageous young woman taught me about courage, and that there is always an opportunity in adversity, there is always a way through the storms in life and that we are stronger than we think. Sometimes we just need the support of others to get us through the storms. 

That is why my passion is walking alongside you to empower you on your journey and find the calm in the storms of life. 

What is a “storm” in life that you have overcome? What did it teach you about yourself?   I’d love to hear from you- please share below. 

I would love to help you if you are experiencing a ” storm in your life” or if you have weathered the storm but now needing some help to find the “real you” who may have got lost in the storm. I would love to chat, why not book a free clarity call with me now:)
 

Categories
Chaos / Upheaval Fresh Start Mindset/Strenghts Resilience

Forging a New Path (When You Can’t See the Old One)

Katie started an office supply company when she was in her twenties. She grew the small business from her spare bedroom into a thriving brand with over three dozen employees. She was proud of what she’d done and the life she’d created for herself.

But three years ago, Katie discovered someone had embezzled the company’s funds and left it nearly bankrupt. The employee who’d committed this crime was Katie’s mother.

In the coming months, Katie lost everything—both her business and her home. She found herself in her forties starting her whole life over again.

Maybe you’ve found yourself in Katie’s shoes. You’ve lost everything and you have no choice but to rebuild your entire life. But you’re not sure what that process should look like exactly. here are some tips: 

 

Let Go

Start by letting go. Think about the things that are no longer serving you. Katie had spent years building up her business only to lose it. For a long time, she could only focus on what she’d had.

A friend encouraged her to stop looking backward. “You can’t move forward in your car if the gear is stuck in reverse,” She advised. “Terrible things happen to everyone. You don’t get a choice in that. What you do get to decide is what gear you’ll put your life in.”

Create New Traditions

Sometimes, the hardest part of starting over is letting go of habits that we loved. Maybe you were financially set and could afford to go shopping for new clothes once a week. Perhaps you were close with your family and had brunch with relatives every Sunday.

When you’re forced to start over, missing these traditions is painful. But don’t get caught up in sitting around wishing for how things were. Create new traditions that honor what your life looks like now. For example, you could invite your closest friends over on Sundays for game day or spend the time you use to go shopping to refashion old items in your closet.

Design Your Vision

When you’re forging a new path in live, it’s easy to get focused on what you don’t want. For example, if you’re leaving a bad marriage, you may swear off romantic relationships or a certain city.

While these blanket statements may make you feel good, they don’t help you create more of what you want in your life. This is where a vision board can be helpful. You can use one to create a positive image of the new life you’re looking to make.

The vision board you make can be physical—you can grab magazines, books, and other old media to create yours. But a vision board can also be digital and you can use a website like Dream It Alive or Vision Board to design yours.

Click the link below to listen to short audio about Resilience After a Crisis – currently we are experiencing a global Pandemic and many people are being forced to rebuild their lives in some way or the other.

Rebuilding your life after adversity isn’t easy. But you have the smarts (and the power!) to do it. Embrace this season of rebirth in your life!

Are you struggling to rebuild your life after adversity? It’s sure not easy….but it is possible!  It also helps to have someone to walk along side you to guide and support you – I would love to help! Let’s chat about what you need to pick up the pieces and start over. You can book you free session with me here