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Category: Mindset/Strenghts

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Mindset/Strenghts Relationships Self Esteem/Self Confidence

How To Confidently Express Your Feelings At Work

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Mixing feelings with work?

Never!

Society usually tells us to keep our work problems and home problems totally separate, which ends up making a lot of people feel like they can’t bring their feelings with them to work situations. 

Here’s the reality: Feelings are inevitable at work.

Just like any situation in life, you’re going to experience feelings and emotions in your work environment.

You can’t always act on these, but you can embrace them and know when and how you can express them. Start with these three strategies! 

Go Directly to the Source

If you need to have a difficult or uncomfortable conversation with somebody, your best bet is to cut to the chase. Go directly to the source and ask to have a mature discussion.

Office politics tend to confuse and exacerbate the situation, and it’s much better to involve yourself directly with someone rather than engage in gossip beforehand.

Because you’re in an office environment, you can always set up a meeting with your coworker or boss to hash things out. Otherwise, if you prefer a more casual setting, ask to get coffee or go for a walk outside of work. 

Be Calm and Know Your Stance

Work environments can be stressful, but don’t let that disrupt your calm disposition.

Going into a discussion with a sense of calm is really important. You may be taking a bold stance, and that’s perfectly fine.

But you should make sure you stay calm about it and don’t get heated. Be confident that you know what you’re doing, and don’t let that change as the conversation begins to take form. 

Remember Your “Why”

At the end of the day, you and all of your coworkers are there for the same reason. You’re not trying to disrupt the structure or success of the company, nor are you trying to stir up unnecessary drama.

You all have a “why” or a reason to be there. Your job is important to you, so try to remember this throughout your conversation.

You’re trying to work through this and talk it out because you want to improve things, not make anything worse. Don’t forget that! 

We’ve covered three big strategies for expressing your feelings at work, but you’re not limited to these three.

Every situation is different, so take some time to think about yours and create your strategy accordingly.

Good luck! 

Categories
Fresh Start Mindset/Strenghts Personal Growth Resilience Self Esteem/Self Confidence

7 Things People Who Believe in Themselves Do Differently

What is about people who believe in themselves? We see it in the way they carry themselves, in the way they converse with others, and in the things they accomplish. Self-belief in action is an amazing thing to see, and something everyone should aspire to.

At the same time, we very quickly become intimidated by this kind of change. It seems like it would be hard to change how you think and feel about yourself. We tend to stall out before we begin because it seems like only ‘special’ people are going to get ‘there.’ 

But is that true? A closer examination shows us otherwise. In fact, you’ll find people who believe in themselves have a lot of traits in common. Let’s look at some of those now.

They Know Where to Find Happiness

…and it’s not where you’ve been looking. People with self-belief know true happiness is something that comes from inside, not from how many toys you have or how many digits you have in your checking account.

They’re Really Not Interested in What Everyone Else is Doing

With no judgment and even less interest in comparing themselves to others, people who believe in themselves tend to focus more on what they’re doing. The competition simply doesn’t matter.

They Pick their Battles

When you lack self-belief, you tend to say ‘yes’ to everything. The problem? If you don’t value your time, no one else will either. Learning which things to say ‘yes’ to and more importantly, how to say ‘no,’ shows the world around them their time is worth fighting for.

They Know When to Speak Confidently

There’s no waffling or room for wishy-washy statements in the world of self-belief. Your ‘yes’ means ‘yes.’ You use a phrase like, “I know…” or “I can…” without second-guessing or wondering if they really can follow through with what they’re saying.

They Look for the Challenge

There’s nothing like a little healthy competition with yourself. Self-belief means you know the value of pushing to get to the next level. To a person with this kind of self-belief, life becomes almost like a game to move up by facing a challenge straight-on.

They Know How to Fail

The person with self-belief isn’t afraid to try, which sometimes means not accomplishing what they set out to do. When that happens, they take the lesson learned without making excuses or worrying about how it looks. 

They Don’t Need the Spotlight

When you believe in yourself, you don’t need accolades and are quick to point out the accomplishments of others. Most people with strong self-belief are modest. They know their value; they don’t need someone else to underscore it for them.

The amazing thing about all of these traits is just how easy they are to develop in yourself. By taking the time to build habits of self-belief, you’ll be amazed at how quickly you become one of those fantastic people who really believe in themselves. 

If however you are struggling with self-belief or self confidence, I would love to help you. Click here to book your free clarity call :)

Categories
Mindset/Strenghts Personal Growth Self Care

Take Charge of Your Habits

woman wears gray top smokes on mouth

There’s a quote that has been around for a long time that shows us why we need to take charge of our habits….

“The chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.” by Warren Buffet.

If you don’t take charge of your habits, even ones that seem harmless, they will easily control you.

While habits are easily formed and followed through, especially once your brain recognizes them as habits, you can still change them. Always remember that you are in control, not your habits. 

Habit expert and writer of the book ‘Atomic Habits’ James Clear has four rules for forming habits that can help you take charge of them. You may have some good habits..and some not so good habits, either way you can still use these rules to gain some measure of control. These rules, according to Atomic Habits, are: 

  • Make it obvious
  • Make it attractive
  • Make it easy
  • Make it satisfying

Make it Obvious

To take charge of your habits, you need to make them obvious. For example, let’s pretend you have decided you want to start running. If your running shoes and gear are in the closet, then that habit isn’t so obvious or apparent. Your brain will just want to stay in bed in the morning rather than sifting through your wardrobe for your shoes.

So, you can put your running shoes by the door and make sure that they are the first thing you see in the morning. Then you’ll be reminded that you should run today. To break bad habits, you want to hide them away. 

Make it Attractive

With habits, most people focus on the long-term goals. You might say, “I will go for a run to get my beach body in ten weeks.” While that goal is noble, it does nothing when running in the cold and feeling miserable. 

So, make your habits attractive and give yourself a reward or incentive to get it done. Perhaps you could run with a friend, or choose a running path that has a pleasant view or lovely surroundings. I also find jogging on a bush track gives me far more pleasure just by being out amongst nature, that jogging on the city streets. For bad habits, add extra steps or make going the habit very unattractive.

Make it Easy

Remember, the brain always takes on the path of least resistance. If that path happens to lead to your habit, then more power to you. It might seem illogical, but instead of telling yourself. I will run a mile today; say that you will only run a block.

Having smaller micro-habits will make everything easier and will help you do them. Most people go too big, get discouraged, and then get burnt out. But running a block, reading one page of a book, or doing one push-up is something that takes no time at all. Plus, if you are able to achieve one small habit, what is stopping you doing another…and another?

For bad habits, add more resistance to them and make them harder to achieve.

Make it Satisfying

Reward yourself along the journey for your habits, and you’ll keep doing them. Maybe if you go running for thirty days, give yourself some type of reward. Have a good meal, watch a movie, do something you wouldn’t normally do, and also reflect on how running has made you a better person than you were 30 days ago.

For bad habits, remove the satisfaction from them, and you won’t see them as a reward.

You Are In Control

Remember, you are in control! Every habit, good or bad, comes from your brain, you are the one that is in charge.

If you want to make or break a habit, you are the only one who can do so. Follow the four steps, and you’ll find that it gets easier and easier to take charge and make your habits work for you.

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