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Tag: asking for help

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Mindset/Strenghts Resilience

7 Things You Can Do To Create Happiness During The Toughest of Times

Upheaval drags everyone down. A crisis wears on a person, eroding mood and destroying optimism. As you go into survival mode, it becomes harder and harder to hold onto any kind of joy at all. Instead, your days are taken up with emotions such as worry, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, and fear. 

It seems like a pretty tough time to find happiness, doesn’t it?

Yet, more than ever, this is precisely when you need happiness most. It’s a positive outlook and a great deal of optimism, which is going to get you through these tough times, which means it’s up to you to create this happiness as soon as possible. Why not try these tips?

# Take a Walk

Physical exercise promotes mood in tremendous ways. Seize the chance to take a break for a few minutes when you can and step outside. Walk at an even pace, fast enough to raise your heart rate a little for the best results.

 

# Find a Distraction

You can’t focus on the crisis every minute of the day without driving yourself crazy. Occasionally you need to give your brain a break. Try reading a book, watching a show on TV, doing a puzzle, or engaging in a hobby for a little bit. 

 

# Eat Something Good

It’s so easy to forget regular meals when you’re in the midst of a crisis. But low blood sugar affects mood in negative ways. Also, if you’re just grabbing snacks, junk food can make you lethargic and inhibit your ability to think clearly. As much as possible, try to maintain a regular schedule for meals. And eat healthily!

# Fix Something

Your world is out of control and can’t be fixed easily. Help your mood by finding something you can correct and exert control over this situation. Why not do the mending you’ve set aside? Or do one of those little home repair jobs you’ve meant to tackle. 

 

# Sleep

Lack of rest does affect mood negatively. Even in a crisis, you need to sleep. Stay on your sleep schedule as much as possible.

 

# Hang Out with Friends

It’s not mentally healthy to isolate. Make time for friends, even if for only a short phone call. Touching base with people who love and support you will do wonders for your mood.

# Do Something

Act. Nothing makes you feel more helpless than inactivity. It might be you’re not able to do what you normally would during this upheaval. Instead, find the next best thing you can do and focus on that for five minutes at a time until it’s done.

Remember, happiness can’t be forced. Some days you’re just going to feel what you’re going to feel. But by paying attention to your mood and working to improve it, you set yourself up for the greatest success. 

Looking for a coach to help you with creating more happiness in your life? I can help! Check out my affordable coaching packages to help get you out of your moment of chaos and onto a clear path to getting things back on track to normal. Contact me today

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Anxiety/Stress Fresh Start Mindset/Strenghts Self Care

Asking For Help: Ease Anxiety and Stress

Have you ever felt that asking for help sometimes feels like the hardest thing to do?

It’s funny how often we’d rather take on impossible tasks and stressful daily schedules. Asking for help takes vulnerability and opens you up to another person.

For some of us, this may come easy. For those of you who struggle, read on for some ways to ask for help. It will ease your anxiety and stress!

Accept That You Need and Deserve Help

The first and possibly hardest step is accepting that you not only need help, but you deserve it. Maybe you used to ask for help all the time, but negative reactions made you stop. If you’re struggling, though, you need to accept that you need help or things are going to get worse.

Give that younger version of yourself who hardened your heart to others a break. You have come a long way since then. You’ve learned how to do a lot on your own, so it is not unreasonable to ask others to help you now. It is often the case that those around you would rather know you need help than watch you fail.

Know What You Need

Once you accept that you need and deserve help, you need to make sure you know what you need help with. Do you need advice buying a car? Do you need a co-worker’s advice? Make sure you know exactly what it is so you can go to the right person and ask the right thing.

Often, we struggle with requests for help because we don’t know what we need. We convey some idea that we think might help, but the other person gets confused and offers favors that don’t make your life easier. All of that struggle can be avoided if you know exactly what you need from a person.

Don’t Leave People Guessing About What You Need

According to Alice Boyes of PsychologyToday.com, “When asking for help, make sure the person knows exactly what you want. For example, rather than just tell you what to do, you want your spouse to show you what to do. So make sure you you ask for that, make it clear you want to be shown and and not just told.”

This also works in the office. Your boss and coworkers may sometimes seem like they are waiting around for you to fail so they can be mad at you. The truth is they all want you to succeed because you are on their team. When you do your job better, so does everyone else. And your boss makes more money!

Therefore, in relationships both personal and professional, make sure to ask for specific things when you know you need them. The clearer you are, the more likely you will receive the support you need and deserve.

Give Help

When you readily help others, they will readily help you. The key is knowing when to say no. If you are already feeling overwhelmed, you may not be able to meet someone’s request. This is fine! You have to make sure that you are doing well before you can help others.

When you are doing well, however, it benefits others, the world, and even you to offer up quality assistance to your friends, family, and members of your office and community. When those around you are happy and productive, it helps you and your entire community! So, make some time to help others and you will never be wanting for assistance.

Asking for help is hard because we think it makes us weak. We’re also afraid we won’t get it. We have to push on past these fears with the firm belief that we need and deserve assistance. We must also walk the walk and help others in return.

If you would like some help but struggle to ask for it,  I would love to help you. Contact me today for the supportive and confidential help that you deserve. 

Categories
Mindset/Strenghts

How To Tap Into Your Own Strengths To Succeed In Life

You have heard the term personal strengths, you even know that you probably have them, but you aren’t quite sure what they are or how to use them.

Being able to tap into these strengths and use them provides you with self-confidence and boosts your happiness and resilience in handling difficult situations. 

Have you ever felt like you just don’t have what it takes to get to where you want to be? It might be because you aren’t effectively relying on your strengths. You can start reaping the benefits of your personal strengths now, and here is how to do it.

The Past

While it isn’t generally healthy to dwell in the past, you may need to cast your mind back to your greatest moments in life. To the times when you were on top of everything and felt in complete and utter control of your destiny. You need a reminder of how you harnessed your strengths in the past, especially when you don’t feel it. 
Don’t focus on negative situations in your past, only draw motivation from your triumphs of strength, and utilize them now to remind you of what you are capable of. 

 

Stop The Comparisons 

There are few things in life more destructive to self-confidence than constantly comparing yourself to others. How can you call yourself tough when someone else is even tougher?
Why should you be happy when there are others unhappier than you?
What makes you worthy of success when there are people just as good, if not better, as you?
This is only going to drain your energy and move your focus from your strengths. When you start comparing yourself to other people, you start to feel insecure and focus on your weaknesses.
Forget the things that you’re not good at and put your focus on the things you are good at and getting better at those. 
It doesn’t matter if Lisa from accounting handled a particular situation better than you that one time or if Bob from HR raised his eyebrow at something, you said. There are always going to be areas where you don’t know as much as someone else or skills that you haven’t mastered.
Guess what?
That means that there are plenty of strengths you have that others just don’t, so keep your focus on those. 

 

Be Positive

Everyone has traits that they would like to get rid of or change, whether it’s a lack of patience or a tendency to procrastinate. Don’t focus on those aspects of your character; rather focus on the positive traits you possess.
It is in those traits that your strengths lie and you should use that to your advantage. Maybe people turn to you in times of trouble because you have a great attitude or you’re helpful, lean into those strengths. 
When you feel at a low point, remind yourself of the strengths you have and how you use them on a daily basis. If you find yourself self-questioning often make a note of every time you use your strength so you can reflect on the successes you’ve experienced. 

 

Be Strong

Do you know what happens when you offer excuses for yourself?
You make them.
When there’s an out, you find yourself taking it every time. You don’t want to live life as a victim and make excuses for shortcomings.
Why would you when you can harness your strengths and utilize them on a daily basis? Don’t give yourself an out, your only option is to succeed and to do so you must use your strengths. 
Do you know what your strengths are? If not you can take a helpful test to determine where they lie (https://www.kent.ac.uk/careers/Choosing/strengths.htm). 

Want some help in identifying your strengths? I can help! I would love to identify and draw out your strengths – even the ones you don’t think you have! Check out my affordable coaching packages to help get you discover your amazing strengths so you can use them to improve your life. Contact me today.

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